Spiritual Aikido

David Brooks, a columnist for the New York Times, wrote recently, "In a culture that generally celebrates empowerment and self-esteem, A.A. begins with disempowerment. The goal is to get people to gain control over their lives, but it all begins with an act of surrender and an admission of weakness."

Brooks was recognizing the contributions of Bill Wilson, the founder of A.A., whose 12 steps has helped millions recover from their addictions, whether it be chemical, overeating, gambling or sexual.

As ironic as it sounds, the 12 step program is based on surrendering and admitting your weakness. The profound value of this honest act is that the ego or the I-can-fix-it mentality, is pushed aside, and replaced with a spiritual awakening that accepts things that cannot be changed. To many, this admission of weakness is an abject announcement of failure. But really, it is the door opening to a path of healing and wisdom.

Many of us come into this world thinking we are going to conquer it. When we don't our bruised egos don't surrender, but instead become absorbed in self pity and feelings of inadequacy, leading to an escape into alcohol, drugs, overeating, gambling. The ego is still driving the behaviour, albeit wrecklessly.

The ego is tenacious and usually does not give up until it is utterly defeated and we find ourselves flat on our back without any options. That is when we surrender and know that we are at the mercy of a power greater than ourselves. That is when the ego is replaced by grace and humility.

But maybe that is why as a culture we are at a crossroads, where the consequences of our collective unchecked hubris has put us face-to-face with environmental and financial upheaval.

During these times, I am wary of those beating their chests and their bombastic pronouncements. Instead, I am looking for the one waving the white flag of wisdom.